Ok. So you’re at the bar with a couple of friends and you notice the striking brunette you’ve had your eyes for the last 40 minutes approach the bar alone.
Now’s your chance. If you’re going to talk to her, this is it.
I bet you’re feeling pretty nervous at this point, right? Because this IS the hardest part – actually working up the courage to talk to her when you know there’s a chance you could get blown off.
But the thing is, right now you are both just two strangers in a bar, and by casually greeting her you really have nothing to lose.
Hey, there will always be some risks – she may already have a partner or you may not be her type, but if you don’t try then you’ll never know.
But only a really bitchy woman would completely crush a guy when he approached her – and this is NOT the kind of woman you’d want to be with anyway.
So go on, approach the bar. And follow these three simple but highly effective steps for making attraction-sparking conversation:
1. Start light in your approach.
Pull up beside the hot brunette (not too close, not too far away), smile and say “Hey”. See how she responds and then ask the bartender for your drink.
If the hot girl smiles, says “Hey” back and turns TOWARDS you rather than away, this is a great sign. If she gives a quick reply and turns away towards her table, this is a sign that for whatever reason, she’s not interested, and you’re best to set your sights on someone else.
It’s that simple. So if she is turning towards you and lingering at the bar, this is the perfect time to strike up a casual conversation.
Note: You don’t need much to strike up a conversation with her – don’t think too much about your line. You do NOT have to use any cheesy pick-ups here or go into heavy topics.
In fact, the LAST thing that a girl wants is to be bombarded with heavy questions from a guy straight away, e.g. what she does, where she grew up, as this just SCREAMS ‘desperate’ to her.
Instead, simply start by introducing yourself and offer your hand to shake if it feels right. Then just ask something casual like; “Having a good night?” or “Are you watching the game?”
Believe me, if she’s into you and she’s enjoying the conversation, you can tell this simply by the fact that she is allowing the conversation to continue.
And if you start up light and casual, the convo will naturally start to get deeper as it goes on.
2. Eye contact is key
As you are talking to the hot brunette, it’s important to project the right kind of body language, to make her feel engaged but comfortable in your presence.
First of all, think about your body position. You want to be facing slightly towards her, to show you are interested in the conversation, but not fully face her front-on, as this may be too intense.
So if you were up at the bar, try facing slightly towards her and slightly towards the bar at the same time, so you are keeping your body language open.
Alternatively, you could turn to face slightly outwards so that you are facing her as well as the other people in the bar. Be wary of facing this way though – you don’t want her to think that you are wanting to leave and go back to your table.
With open body language, she will be able to relax in your presence and feel that she is free to leave at any time – which is important.
The next step is to make sure that you make a lot of eye contact as you are listening to her. This shows that you are interested in what she is saying, and also projects self-confidence.
If you avoid making eye contact, you may come across as insecure, unconfident or disinterested.
And the BEST thing about making deep eye contact is that it is guaranteed to amp-up the SEXUAL attraction between you and your girl, as it literally causes feel-good hormones to be produced.
3. Bring ENERGY to the conversation.
To hook your girl into the conversation, you need to project ENERGY and get her addicted to your great VIBES.
Women love being around men who radiate energy and are making them smile and laugh continuously. Aim to bring the hot woman you are talking to UP and make her feel GOOOD being around you.
How do you do this?
Well, we’ve already covered eye contact – this is a must – but what you also want to do is use a lot of facial expression and smile and laugh freely.
Project your voice so she can clearly hear what you are saying (but don’t go TOOO loud – no-one wants to feel like they are being shouted at), and try not to mumble.
Act confident and fake it ‘til you make it if need be. You don’t need to act arrogant or try too hard to impress her, just be your fun self and show that you are having a really good time talking to her.
Thanks for reading, I hope you’ve found this post helpful and are feeling ready to go out and meet some amazing women!